I’m deeply concerned about the state of our children.
Very concerned.
I see what parents are unintentionally doing—
and the harm it’s causing.
Parents, especially those around 45 and younger, mean well.
They want to give their children something different,
something they didn’t have.
A softer, warmer experience of life.
Maybe these parents felt the intense harshness of their own parents.
Harshness that bordered on abuse—
and sometimes was outright abuse.
Abuse that left wounds so deep,
the only way to survive was to bury them.
Then life happens.
A baby comes.
Their very own baby.
This child brings joy and love—
perhaps love the parent never received.
They vow to never treat their baby the way they were treated.
They pour everything into their child.
That child must know they are loved.
But in their intent to protect, care for, and love,
these parents miss something vital.
They miss the cues.
In shielding their children from discomfort,
they rob them of the chance to build emotional strength,
fortitude, resilience.
The child is protected from harm, yes—
but also from the ability to protect themselves.
Discomfort is taken away too quickly.
Why?
Because the parent overly identifies with it.
“This is what I felt as a kid,” they think.
“And I don’t want my child to feel that way.”
But without learning to feel pain or discomfort,
children never develop the tools to face it.
Today, kids are more depressed than ever.
They seem more connected than ever,
yet they are deeply disconnected.
They’re constantly on their phones,
searching for something,
losing themselves.
They can’t tolerate discomfort—
because they weren’t taught how.
Many lack grit, tenacity, or power.
They crave validation and attention.
They are overstimulated,
suffering silently,
quietly,
deeply.
Parents aren’t to blame.
Neither are the children.
No one is to blame.
But correction is needed.
Kids need to be taught how to deal with pain.
Parents need to be taught how to deal with pain.
Not run from it.
Not escape it.
But understand it.
Heal from it.
Children must be challenged.
Given hard things to do.
Encouraged to figure it out on their own.
That is how grit, tenacity, and resilience are built.
They must learn how to hustle,
how to survive,
how to be without,
how to find their inner calm.
They must learn how to grow,
to improve,
to stick with something until they get it.
They must hear harsh words—
because the world is harsh.
And we must prepare them to thrive in a harsh world.
I fear that many parents are unintentionally weakening their kids—
not out of malice,
but because they themselves haven’t healed from their own pain.
Healing is needed.
But so is discipline.
So are consequences—
rooted in love,
not anger or frustration.
Parents must resist shame.
This is not about blame.
It’s about responsibility.
It’s about learning from mistakes
and committing to helping children grow, develop, and thrive.
Which means parents themselves must grow, develop, and thrive.
Which means they must heal.
Collective healing is how we rise.
It’s how we reclaim our strength,
teach our children resilience,
and ensure they inherit a world
that doesn’t break them—
but builds them.